Telebate

(verb). The act of masterbating while working remotely or teleworking.

John didn't get much done when he was working from home. He just wanted to telebate instead.

Trump Face

(noun). When someone gratuitously adopts an “alpha face” consisting of lowered brows, narrowed eyes and a firmly set mouth, and ends up appearing pathetic instead.

It probably wasn't a good idea for Donald to go full Trump Face when holding that bible.