hemogoblin

an evil creature that constantly requests that others donate blood.

“The Red Cross called.”
“Those hemogoblins!!! I gave blood yesterday!”

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broback

1. noun. portmanteau of “bro” and “blowback”; when a decision unexpectedly creates explosive tension with one’s bros. Not to be confused with brobacking.

2. verb (often 'brobacking'). portmanetau of "bro" and "bareback"; when two bros end up having unprotected anal sex, probably just this one time.

1. “Dude, why is Jeremy so pissed at you right now?”
“Well dude, I banged his sister; he always used to joke about it, so I assumed it would be fine. But after he found out I really did it, I’ve been experiencing a lot of broback.”
"Wait you fucked Jeremy?"
"WHAT? No dude, that's broback*ing*."

2. "Dude why is Jeremy acting so weird around you lately?"
"Look, it's complicated, and I don't really want to talk about it..."
"OMG were you brobacking Jeremy?????"
"No!! No!! I uh...I banged his sister! yeah, that's it..."
"Oh, so it's just broback. Whew."

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Grammar Mounty

a stickler about Canadian English.

Todd became very angry when his American friends spelled "centre" incorrectly. Todd is a Grammar Mounty.

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Pun-dit

a person who habitually uses puns in conversation; an asshole.

“Hey did you see my new Urban Dictionary word? I totally PUN-DIT.”
“You’re an asshole.”

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expiration-dating

1. when a relationship that turns long-distance goes on so long that unused condoms purchased at the beginning of the relationship have expired.

2. the act of inflicting this situation upon another person, esp. a man.

“Are you still going out with Giselle?”
“I dunno man, I still love her, but she’s been expiration-dating me for so long I had to throw out a whole box of durex!”

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cramnesia

The state of forgetting everything one has learned during the past 24 hours of intensive study as soon as one is confronted with an exam.

Despite staying up all night skimming his Art History textbook, Eliot suffered a bad case of cramnesia and could not remember anything he'd read when he attempted to write an essay comparing the works of Jan Van Eyck to those of Hieronymus Bosch.