LOLAM

Laugh Out Loud At Myself. You just wrote something that made yourself laugh and thought it merited sticking a LOL at the end. But no one laughs. Should have just been a LOLAM.

Oh, man. I just got a vchat from my boss and had to push the cat off my desk. LOL!! Er, LOLAM.

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HAB

Hot As Balls. As in, "it's a hot day", or more generally "that shit is really hot!".

"Whoa, it's HAB out there today!!"

"Hey man, pass the HAB sauce."