Cock Boffin

An expert in the field of phallus: a ‘Dean of Dick’, a veritable ‘Nob Scholar’.

“Have you talked to Lee recently? Well, he must have been ‘boning-up’ because he’s a proper Cock Boffin. Honestly there’s nothing that boy doesn’t know...”

Paint your own portrait

For a gentleman to attempt to cum in his own face...

Technique - lie on your back with a pillow behind your head. With a rolling motion bring your knees as far back towards your head as possible (you may hold your legs with your free arm) Point and shoot...

Good luck and make sure the door is locked

Mike: "I am bored"

Lee: "You could always pop into the other room and try to paint your own portrait?"

Mike: "Good idea - I think I shall..."

11👍 2👎

Milking a Dragon

Receiving a surprisingly warm or spicy facial.

Lee: “What a night…”

Mike: “I can see that!”
Lee: “I know, my eyes are really red..”

Mike: “They certainly are - it looks like you’ve been milking a dragon…”

Lee: “Must’ve been something he ate..”