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Random
The wander ass son of a bitch who keeps getting in the way of the chick's ass you are trying to get a look at.
I was trying to check out crissie's ass but booty blocker bob kept getting in the way. Bob needs a good pipe beatin'.
8π 1π
The nearly lost art of shitting in a purse then placing it where it will likely be found (shopping cart at a grociery store parking lot) then waiting to see the reaction of those who "find" it.
Works just as well on good samartitans as the lesser well intentioned.
I just got a new video camera, lets go to the mall and run the poop purse surprise.
When a chick looks down at her boobs then directly in your eyes, repeatedly, suggesting that she wants you to motorboat the living hell out of her.
When done properly, you mat forget what the hell you were doing.
I think Anessa pulled the jedi boob trick on me, i cant remember how the hell i got here.
14π 1π
When it becomes necessary to exit a chick's apartment via the window because you realized too late that you are drying your ass and junk with her "guest towel" after bangining the shit out if her"
I wasnt paying attention and i had to make a guest towel get-a-way. Man I dont know which i left messier, her or her goddam linens.
A vibrator, cleverly renamed so that it can be sold at any drug store.
Christina bought a personal massager to help her neck pain. I wonder why they made it 12 inches long and as thick as a coke can? (Buzzing sound and moaning) Hey thats not her neck!
43π 2π
The bottom cushion in a car seat where yor ass rests.
As opposed to the companion"back cushion"
"When my girl crashed my car she shit herself which ruined the ass cushion in my caddy."
When your bang session is so good that you destroy the headboard on the bed. Extra points for putting splinters in her hair.
Yesterday my chick and i were really tearing it up, i mean we were headboard bustin'!
19π 1π