woke up and chose chaos

woke up and chose chaos — a corollary to waking up and choosing violence. Waking up and choosing chaos involves beginning your day with an impulsive act that can and does throw your entire existence into disarray.

A common excuse for waking ping up and choosing chaos is: “I just had to speak from ‘my strong place’”.

And then the chaos ensues.

I woke up and chose chaos when I called my wife’s divorce lawyer and told him to do her worst — I dared her!!!!!!

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Train Whistle

Train Whistle — the new “dog whistle”. The current idiom “saying the quiet part out loud” points to the idea that a new term must be used to discuss impolite political discourse. Dogs can her at a frequency that humans cannot; so, the old idiom “dog whistle” pointed to a subtle statement.

Well, in 2023, both irony and subtlety are dead hence the new term “Train Whistle. If you can’t hear you are deaf.

Visiting insurrection prisoners on the eve of the 30th anniversary of the Waco Texas standoff; scheduling a Republican Presidential rally in Waco Texas on the anniversary; and Trump’s proclamation that he is “THE RETRIBUTION” of the Republican Party and MAGA; Trump’s threatening doom and destruction if indicted — this — collectively — isn’t a dog whistle it’s a Train Whistle.

It’s in your face; and, there is no more “quite part” to say out loud. IT’S ALL OUT LOUD IN THE RANGE OF HUMAN HEARING!!!!!!

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The Slipping into Darkness Rule

The Slipping into Darkness Rule — this rule says: if you hear any part or portion of the song Slipping in Darkness by War in a movie, documentary, or television show; then, THAT’S JUST SOMEBODY’S ASS! Somebody is ‘bout to die or become incarcerated.

Period.

The ultimate song for foreshadowing in urban themed movies

The Slipping into Darkness Rule Can be seen in application in the following media presentations. If you hear this song That’s just somebody’s ass. Period!!!!

Mayans MC season 3 episode 1
Maplethorpe

The Get Down season 1 Episode 5
Suicide Squad
Unsolved: The Murders of Tupac and the Notorious B.I.G. Season 1 Episode 1
American Me
The Deuce season 1 episode 1 (Pilot Episode)

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A man is not a plan

A man is not a plan — On Thursday February 15th 2024, Fani Willis electrified the non-Black world with the Black Cultural Maxim: A man is not a plan. Taught by her stern southern father she was taught to be a strong independent woman who could take care of herself. Pops gave her the following instructions that would help to prevent a Trump-like pussy grab. 1) if you go out in a date have $200.00 with you so that if a man decides to act up; then you can go wherever you want to go. 2) Keep six months of living expenses in cash on hand at all times in safes and lock boxes to buttress against unforeseen misfortune. 3) Pay your own way. A man who pays is a man who expects to be laid. 4) Speak up for yourself. Any strong independent woman will tell you that this is a good strategy for self-protection. As Fani said, the only man who ever paid her way is her father.

You go girl, YOU GO!!!!!!!

Girrrrrrrrrrrrl, I got my own house, my own car, and my own money; a man is a companion — A man is not a plan!!!

Gawaka Gawaka

Gawaka Gawaka — the sound of an overly performative act of fellatio.

Gentlemen, if your partner is “doing the most”; then they are trying to “get done”; and, not enjoying what they’re doing.

It’s just basic psychology.

And if you enjoy that; then you deserve everything you AREN’T getting.

There is no such thing as “something for nothing”; and, the act of unilaterally giving pleasure to another without the though of reciprocity is counter to human nature.

It’s called “having your soul taken” for a reason!!!!!!!!

Oral sex is one thing; but, if your partner is “on demon time” with a “Gawaka Gawaka” you may need to look up the word “suuccubus” or “incubus” depending on which flag you fly.

Some will have to look up both words.

All mythology has its basis in reality.

As Dracula says: “I don’t drink…WINE.”

Sometimes this act is performed in conjunction with a grapefruit that has been mildly heated in a microwave oven. The erect member is inserted through the center of the warm fruit, preliminarily, before the Gawaka Gawaka begins.

Some find the combination of the moving grapefruit and the hyperactive mouth intoxicating. Others don’t like acidic juice in their Urethra.

Remember, most things sound so much better than they actually are when you experience them for yourself.

Different streaks for different freaks!!!!

Dude, I’m scared of my new lover. She was on demon time with a triple-x Gawaka Gawaka. I would have asked her where she learned to do that; if I had been able to talk or move during or afterward. SHIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIT, what comes next: EXORCISM?????

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He was running his mouth, wasn’t he!!!!!!!

He was running his mouth, wasn’t he!!!!!!! — The epitaph of any dead snitch that thought that the witness protection program would keep him safe.

A member of the community standing over a bullet riddled body with a rat in each hand and one shoved in its mouth:

“ He was running his mouth, wasn’t he!!!!!!!”

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Howdy Booty Time

Howdy Booty Time — A silly answer to give your wife if she ever asks you what time it is. This rejoinder is based on the show opening for the vintage children’s television program “The Howdy Dooty Show” which ran from 1947 to 1960.

The approach makes your wife laugh and two out of three times she will get up off of some ass because cuteness is an aphrodisiac.

This technique cannot be over used because it loses both its potency and its cuteness rapidly; you have to pick your moments with this particular approach. “Howdy Booty Time” is good for at least two out of the 104 average yearly sex acts in the context of a fun marriage.

The secret of both life and cheap joke telling is timing. Do not fault this technique if it fails to work for you — the fault is in your timing and delivery.

This move is known as “Aristocrats’ of Wife Propositioning”. The skill in telling the joke is in creating a lead up to the punchline that makes this oft told tale funny.

Good comedians test their skill with “The Aristocrats”; and husbands who remain lovers test themselves with “ Howdy Booty Time”.

The key is is in crafting a set up so creative that it makes the punchline both cute and funny.

NEVER ANSWER THE “QUESTION: WHAT TIME IS IT” IF YOU GO TO PRISON.

NEVER!!!!!!!!

WIFE: Hey honey, what time is it?

HUSBAND (imitating Wesley Snipes in both Blade and Passenger 57 while dinings a pair of really cool sunglasses): It’s Howdy Booty Time — we have a good arrangement; you have the booty and I can wear it out ALWAYS BET ON BLACK!!!!!

Wife (walking back towards the bedroom): You’re so stupid!!!! Leave the sunglasses on!

Aaaaaaaaaaaaaand scene!!!!!!!!

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