Woodbury Theorem

A theorem stating that any sentence can be altered to end in the word bitch and it will still make sense and be appropriate.

Also known as The Woodbury Theory of Bitchitude.

Would you pass the salt?

-After Woodbury Theorem-

Would you pass the salt, Bitch?

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Facial Hair Rule

The rule that states that fascists have mustaches:
(Hitler, Mussolini)
and communists have Beards:
(Marx, Castro, Lenin)

Mao is an exception, because he is Asian and therefore does not need facial hair.

Also known as the FHR

According to the Facial Hair Rule, your new friend is not a communist as you believe, but is actually striving for fascism!

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