Twittiot

A person who cannot stop Twittering.

Hey Twittiot!...Do you think you can put down that Blackberry long enough to talk to me in person?

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Textidriver

Any operator of a public transportation vehicle who endangers passengers by texting while driving.

News Report: “This just in … yet another bus driver lost control of the bus he was operating, plowing into the front of crowded mid-town restaurant. He was the third textidriver this month.”

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Same-sect marriage

The marriage of two people who share the same religious beliefs or practices.

The marriage was frowned upon by both sets of parents because of different religious beliefs. They would have preferred that it was a same-sect marriage

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Some-sex marriage

A marriage where a couple participates in minimal sexual activity.

“Bill and Wanda’s sex life was almost non-existent. They had a some-sex marriage.”

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Cell-ebrity

A celebrity who serves prison time.

“Bernie Madoff is the nation’s newest cell-ebrity.”

Botched Mitzvah

A Bar Mitzvah that goes badly.

“I went to Jason’s Botched Mitzvah Saturday. Jason threw up during his reading. The DJ never showed up. The ice swan melted and they ran out of shrimp.”

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