SLA Industries

Possibly the greatest dice-throwing RPG that has never become "mainstream" like "Dungeons & Dragons" or "Vampire: The Mascarade". Futuristic cyber-punk bliss with an OTT sense of humour. A must for fans of funny shaped dice.

"Power is a gift. Like all gifts from SLA Industries, it can be taken away." - Mr Slayer, owner of SLA Industries.

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bilbo

For whatever reason, a bilbo became the name given to an individual who wasn't given much chance of survival during games of Advanced Dungeons & Dragons. For added humililation, the name was pronounced in a low voice with the emphasis on the O. Also used to designate an NPC who was clearly about to die in a poorly disguised plot twist.

"Oi, Bilbo! Just pop your head around that door and tell us if any orcs are there... oh, he's been shot in the head."

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Red October

Named after the famous Russian submarine, Red Octobers are those once-in-a-lifetime turds that block the toilet. You can't flush them, you can't deal with them in the normal way. Toilet paper is a serious no-no with regards to Red Octobers as this merely increases the "gross" factor by twelve. If you see a Red October, the chances are that you'll need to call the emergency services.

"Mum! Can you call the Fire Bridgade, we've got a Red October here! I've tried the shower head but that doesn't work. Make sure they bring their bio-hazard suits this time!"

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NOMS

Acronym for Not On My Shift. Used to pass the buck and shift blame for an incident that you are directly responsible for but do not want to admit. Care must be taken when using the word as management will think you are muttering under your breath.

"Mr Ben, did you see who attacked Mrs Webster with the fire extinguisher?"

"No, I didn't. NOMS."

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satnav woman

A mysterious woman, locked away in a secret lab somewhere in Germany, whose sultry sexy tones provide guidance to millions to male drivers via their satellite navigation system. Can also be used to describe the vocal commands heard in other places, like an elevator.

"After... 200 yards, turn... left. Turn left. Do it now. You have turned... right. You are now going the wrong way." - satnav woman in full flow.

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sluce

That horrible oil that gathers around the edge of a dinner plate whilst eating badly-cooked or cheap canteen food. Unnaturally red or yellow in colour and about as good for your health as a heart attack.

"Hey chef! What's all this sluce doing here?"

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Barclay's Banker

Cockney rhyming slang for someone who excessively masturbates, a wanker. Slightly better than calling someone a Gareth Hunt, at any rate.

"Get up the apple and pears, you Barclay's banker! I don't Adam and Eve it..."

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