canadian

A country known for reasonably good beer, hockey, snow, and maple syrup. Gave the world some good actors, and damn funny comedians. Canada's greatest gift to the world: The Kids In The Hall.

Also a country full of arrogant, hypocritical snobs who greatly enjoy talking shit about other countries for no apparent reason. Childish internet tough guys with a massive, and entirely undeserved superiority complex that makes Americans seem modest by comparison. Canadians take third place in arrogance coming in second to France, with Brazil taking up first place.

When thinking of these people, think of Canada as America's little brother. For this metaphor, imagine America as the older brother that became a doctor, went off to war, and became a famous hero. Canada didn't go to college, because Canada wanted to smoke pot, and try doing stand-up comedy. Canada is great fun at parties, but get it drunk, and all Canada does is talk shit about America. Canada's overall good really, it's just those few times the more asinine part of Canada shows -like in the other definitions posted here- that make Canada look bad. If only someone could SHUT that part of Canada UP, Canada would be so much better for it, and there would be less awkwardness between Canada and it's brother America.

Also, it's rumored the country is so full of immagrants because any natural born canadians are born with extremely small, pine cone shaped genitalia making reproduction nearly impossible. This rumor is unproven, as no one wants to fuck a Canadian.

"Oh, you're a Canadian? Real powerful message you've got there with the maple leaf on your flag. 'Oh we're Canada! Don't mess with us or we'll... dry up and blow away!' What have you accomplished since... ever, besides making people laugh intentionally and unintentionally?"

Some Guy: "Oh, you're from Canada? Hehe, nice country eh?"

Canadian: "HEY, FUCK YOU BUDDY. WE DON'T SAY EH, EVEN THOUGH I JUST DID EH, BUT THAT WAS JUST TO POINT OUT THAT WE DON'T SAY IT EH. I'LL BET YOU'RE STUPID. I'LL BET YOU'RE FROM A STUPID COUNTRY, LIKE AMERICA. AMERICA SUCKS FOR NO REASON THAT I CAN NAME. FUCK ALL OF YOU, MY DICK IS BIGGER THAN YOURS. NO I WON'T PROVE IT YOU FAG. FUCKING AMERICAN FAGGOT THINKING YOU'RE BETTER THAN ME BECAUSE YOU'RE ALL FAMOUS AND ACCOMPLISHED AND SHIT, AND THE REST OF THE WORLD DOESN'T EVEN KNOW WHO WE ARE. AS SOON AS I FINISH MY BEER, I'LL KICK YOUR ASS. I'LL KICK YOUR ASS!!!"

Some Guy: "I'm from Vienna, actually..."

Canadian: "YEAH, WELL FUCK YOU TOO EH!"

Canadian: "We Jim Carrey, Mike Meyers, and Shania Twain! Ha!"

Other person: "Yeah, if you're so great then why'd all your celebrities move *away* from your country?"

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