What Aren't I Doing?

The disarming response to the such questions as, "what are you doing?", "what are you talking about?, and "what is your problem?", substituting some words in your response to fit the question. It is a more polite way to tell that guy in english to fuck off. In order to be used correctly, you must say it the moment the question you are being asked ends. Usually starting with who, what, when, where, why or how, containing one of the contractions hasn't, aren't, won't, shouldn't, or wasn't, and containing a verb. Using it is an automatic +20 pts.

1) - U.S.A.: "who else have you bombed, afghanistan?"

- Afghanistan: "who haven't i bombed?"

2) -Jim: "God dammit, who here else has fucked my girlfriend?"
-Dan: "Honestly Jim, who hasn't fucked your girlfriend?

3)-Man 1: "What are you doing?"

-Man 2, interjecting: "I think the correct question would be what aren't i doing?

20👍 7👎

5 minute rule

A common texting agreement between two or more acquaintances that after a 5 minute period with no reply, you must accept the fact that the person you are trying to reach does not want to talk to you. After this 5 minute period, you may not re-send your message, send a new one, call, or apologize for interrupting their meeting. This agreement is usually made official by means of contract, or simply by not disagreeing when the rule is suggested.

Man 1: Hey man 2, lets go to the club man!

Man 2: Ahh man I can't, im waiting for Katie to reply.

Man 3: Dammit Man 2, you've been waiting for Katie to reply for at least 6 minutes now. 5 minute rule dude.

23👍 17👎