[New Hampshire]

One of the last free states. one of the few places where you can still shoot an intruder in your home in the face and still walk away the victim. Because you are. Although, the Patriot Act has really changed that. We aim to get that shit repealed real soon, though. One of the few places in the country where you won't get swarmed by police if you walk down the street with a DEagle strapped to your hip (assuming you have the proper permits). One of the few places in the country where you can still carry concealed.


There are a lot of hillbillies when you get into cow country. But they're the ones with small arsenals in their basements, so they rock. Can't' do that shit in many places anymore. Our beaches might not be spectacular, but we have some of the best skiing next to Colorado. We might be slow drivers, but we're some of the best because most of us don't have insurance. If you get hit and run in NH, don't take it personally. The person who did it just doesn't feel you're worth an insurance surcharge. That's another thing: lowest insurance rates in the country. You know why? Voted one of the best places to live in America. Speaking of driving, our plates are awesome. Live free or die. It doesn't get much better than that.

There are some states on the east coast that are well developed, yes, with a decent municipal and social structure. Some of them are two words, the second of which may start with 'J'. Like any thriving metropolis, the cities are filled with douchebag cops that drive smartcars so they can't compensate for their small man syndrome with a V8 Crown Vic (NH still rocks the Vic). We do, of course, have more than our fair share of douchebags. Most, while obnoxious, will actually listen when you say, "I don't consent to a search" or "I'm observing". They know the law and they know their boundaries. If we're better than anyone, we don't go around broadcasting it.

We have more wilderness than we know what to do with. In fact, we have so much, some is still unincorporated. Meaning, not recognized by the state. That's what I like to call a "1984 contingency". And it looks like we're gonna need it.

The fact of the matter is, every state has it's flaws. New York has its water. Massachusetts has its taxes, Jersey has its people. The only flaw in New Hampshire is all the republicans, which is okay, because they're not the stupid hypocrite republicans. They're the ones that keep their guns loaded and their mouths shut.

New Hamphire Victim: Hello? Police? I just shot an intruder in my home.

Dispatch: Where do you live, sir?

New Hampshire Victim: 21 Broo - *BANG*

Cop: ...you just shot him again, didn't you?

New Hampshire Victim: He moved.

22👍 19👎