jahandir bandin

Name of a Pakistani swimming pool attendant

Yeah , him up on the high stool with the boat hook .. Jahandir Bandin

Blofelds Cat

When a woman dyes her pubes so utterly blonde , that they take on the likeness of Bond Villan Blofelds Cat

I kid you not Timothy , her blart was so incandescent that it instantly reminded me of Blofelds Cat

pingus tooter

A particularly “sticky-out” womans fanny , pouting out so distinctly, that it resembles comedy cartoon penguin Pingus tooting beak .

Holy shit ! The vaj on her was sticking out like Pingus Tooter

snitklinkers

Tagnuts , klinker, dangleberries, snapdarlichs, The irritating hard little nuggets of shite that can result after being left to cook off in the body’s own heat after failing to correctly wipe the anus following a copious but successful sit-down visit

Marjorie had to deal with her elderly father in law after the old cunt fell over in the parlour . He somehow was devoid of suitable trousering and had in addition , become parted from his Y’s She had to then bear witness to a significant quantity of snitklinkers that was fiercely attached to his third eye lashes and would appear to have been so for several weeks

how sooty feels

Descriptive expression used to highlight the sensations experienced during a medical rectal examination

Dr: Are you ok Sir ?

Me : Am I fuck OK , now I know how Sooty feels

Tokyo Branch of specsavers

Descriptive of a particularly loose woman of whom it could be said - “she’s seen more japseyes than the Tokyo Branch of Specsavers”

Somebody like Katie Price for example

That slapper Jordan has seen more japs eyes than the Tokyo branch of Specsavers

give us a shoogle

Scottish request made usually by an optimistic male , requesting to have a feel of a female’s breasticles

( often , but not always , denied )

Gie’s a shoogle of yer mammary duke-Elliot’s , darlin

Give us a shoogle

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