Elias

Elias’ are like cooked marshmallows, burnt and brown on the outside, yet gooey in the middle. They’re all nasty at tennis, boys scouts, and love burning stuff. At heart they are all arsonists, but get paid for it, because why do something you’re good at for free? Forever lonely in life, these nerds wander the internet trying to find out how to be actually attractive. All in all I would not want to be an Elias.

Who’s he?

Oh, he’s Elias.

Yikes, wouldn’t want to be named that.

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