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Politer way to say fat shit
Man, that Cheeser dude is one corpulent piece of excrement
When someone suggests you stop or start doing something absolutely ridiculous that will affect something important to you, like your swag, your family or your life
Jack: Hey Joe, what are you giving up for lent?
Joe: Nothing, why?
Jack: Oh good. Can you give up chocolate with me?
Joe: No man, that's like shooting myself in the dick and expecting to survive
1π 92π
Dude 1: Hey, imma have kinky sex with my girl tonight
Dude 2: Man, you can't do that! You know it's banned in 30 states, right?
Dude 1: Aww damn
23π 96π
When you're ego makes you look like an overconfident, stuck up idiot.
He looked like a total a-hat, that's called the Kanye West Effect.
45π 105π
What happens when you tell an outrageous, disgraceful, self serving yet strangely believable lie. Treatments can include prescription drugs, seven to nine days off work, a hospital stay and the digging of a large hole.
Georgette: Hey, where's Ryan?
Lina: He's gotta stay home for like two weeks or something
Georgette: Two weeks?! Why?
Lina: He told his mom he was getting a promotion at work but he's being fired
Georgette: Wow, so what you're saying is that he's got bullshitter's remorse?
Lina: in a nutshell
Georgette: Ooh, hefty
4π 92π
Really bad at going to bed, whether you go to bed really late, really early or just in a really unorthodox way
Josie goes to bed at 1:59 but has to shower, bathe, hoover, clean the loo and do the washing first. Therefore Josie is getting an F in bedtime
5π 93π
If you don't talk to another person unless you have to, like siblings that don't talk to each other unless it's to ask to be passed the jam, then you don't really talk unless it's to pass the jam
Katy: Hey! See not Tommy recently?
Jamie: Nah, I don't see much of him now
Katy: Why? I thought you were friends!
Jamie: Yeah, but then he got cocky over something and now we don't really talk unless it's to pass the jam.
Katy: Prrrrrffff, boys!