touch ass

Used when someone is being too intense, irritable, combative, or distracted and they need to relax. It means that they need to get laid and stop annoying everyone else because they have not been able to release their sexual frustration. They need to join the "real world" by benefiting from having sex.

It is a play on words with "touch grass" having a similar meaning but with a sexual emphasis.

You haven't stopped talking about Settlers of Catan all day. You need to go touch ass.

My ex won't stop bugging me and trying to make my life hell. She needs a new boyfriend so she can touch ass and get off my back.