Balls

You don’t have any

Person1: hello
Person2: balls
Person1: Hey look, buddy, I'm an Engineer. That means I solve problems.
Not problems like "What is beauty?", because that would fall within the purview of your conundrums of philosophy.
I solve practical problems.
Fr'instance

How am I going to stop some big mean mother hubbard from tearing me a structurally superfluous new behind?

The answer

use a gun. And if that don't work
use more gun.
Like this Heavy caliber, tripod-mounted, little 'ol number designed by me
Built by me
...and you'd best hope not pointed at you.