shit me

Variant of "Fuck me" (exclamation, not invitation).

Shit me, i've got to go- i've parked on double yellow

47👍 12👎

back of a bus

Ugly, eg "Face like the back of a bus".

Hes got a face like the back of a bus

4👍 8👎

book an ambulance

What someone pretends to do shortly before dangerous activity, eg heavy drinking or a drug session.

Man talking into hand: "Hello, I'd like to book an ambulance... yes, 10 o'clock please..."

8👍 3👎

hard core

Working all day and smoking all night for several days in succession.

Oh dear. Hard core all week = barnsley syndrome

12👍 69👎

motorway

Large, dual carriageway road with special status (in UK, Ireland, Australia). International equivalents: Interstate, Autobahn, autostrada. No stopping, u-turns, etc. Maximum speed limit (in UK) 70mph/110kph. In practice the police leave you alone up to 100mph/160kph. No speed cameras are allowed on ordinary motorways (eg no roadworks, or otherwise reduced speed limits). Due to poor planning and low government spending on all transport, UK motorways are notoriously congested (the busiest stretch or road in Europe, the M6 through Birmingham, has only 3 lanes each way).

Shall we take the motorway or the a-roads?

28👍 7👎

lichfield

Shithole. Like the inside of George Bush's head (theres fuck all there).

We've been robbed! This lounge looks like Lichfield!!

56👍 60👎

deanth

An underweight bag of weed. Mimics the system whereby an 'eighth' = 1/8 oz and a 'teenth' = 1/16 oz. In practice a 'deanth' will be a bag sold as an 'eighth' but weighing noticeably less.
Named for a dealer who regularly sold such short measures.

"An eighth my arse, this is more of a deanth!"

9👍 7👎