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a massively large and/or fine piece o' bootay
MMmmmmm man that bitch got her some padonkadonk!
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A word used by corporate or headquarters weasel types to condescendingly tell employees that they don’t get the big picture.
Employee: “Why have we been working ten hours of overtime a week that we are not being paid for? This clearly violates the Fair Labor Standards Act.”
Corporate Weasel: “You clearly do not have an enterprise view, if you did you would know that we fuck over all employees on a national level, not just here.”
Free Range Parents are predominately rich white people that let their children run around unchecked, even in dangerous situations. It is usually a misguided attempt to allow their children to learn life lessons on their own.
Person 1: I just saw what looked like an eight year old boy, outside in the cold with no jacket on; is that the kid with Free Range Parents?
Person 2: No, that’s Little Billy, his parents aren’t free range, they’re just junkies.
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A Big Skipper is a heavy woman that is strangely attractive. You can find them at local watering holes, if there’s karaoke. Big Skippers while attractive are capable of inflicting serious bodily harm and are known to throw down over any slight, real, or perceived.
Dude 1: “Nixon, what happened to your eye; did you get in a beef last night?
Nixon: “Dude, I was sneaking out with that Big Skipper and three hicks jumped me in the parking lot. Good thing I picked that heavy hitter, she banged out two hicks and I fought the third to a draw.”
A Faux Operator embraces all of the appeaeances of a military spec ops dude, without ever having served. They wear: 511 pants, long beards, Oakley’s, and Hats with tear away Velcro flags. They can often be found in their normal haunts, at celebrity firearms classes. They often feel that the instructor’s past bio somehow is now part of their resume.
Hey bro, I just went over to thank that secret squirrel looking dude, with the new Sig MCX rifle, for his service. You know, the guy that was talking about Mogadishu all morning. He stuttered a bit, then told me, “he had shin splints in ROTC and he couldn’t enlist.” That dude’s not a SEAL, he’s a Faux Operator; I’m gonna steal his $700.00 Aimpount and piss in his canteen later.
The straight face test is a human bullshit detector. If a lie is so bogus, that it can not be uttered with a straight face, it does not pass the straight face test.
Tim: Did your wife buy that bullshit about how you buying a Harley, because they get good gas mileage for your work commute?
Sully: No dude, she saw right through it; It didn’t pass her straight face test.
MBA Catch Phrase Bingo - A series of canned phrases, used by bosses to deflect questions and sound smarter than everyone. Done properly it’s like a magic trick that confuses the masses into thinking the boss answered the question when he didn’t.
Carl: Hey Kyle, Did Lance explain what’s going on with the layoffs during the staff meeting?
Kyle: I asked him and he wouldn’t answer it directly. He decided to play MBA catch phrase bingo with us instead.
He said, “At the end of the day”, “right-size it” and something about “squaring the circle.” No one knows what the fuck just happened in there.
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