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ur asian taking a lie detector test
Son: "Hey dad, I took a lie detector test today."
Dad: "Oh ok, what score you get?"
Son: "Uh...it's a lie detector test, dad. There's no score, you either pass or fail."
Dad: "Okay, so did you pass or no?"
Son: "Well, you didn't want me to tell them how you raped my sister, right?"
Dad: "Shhh! Quiet! Someone could here you!"
Son: "Yeah, that's what I thought. Well, I lied about that, so you wouldn't get in trouble."
Dad: "Ok, good boy."
Son: "But the thing is... they detected that I had lied."
Dad: "WHAT??? FBI GUNNA SHOW UP AT DA FRONT DOR ANY MINUT NOW! STOOBID!"
Son: "No dad, they won't. I killed them all before they could call the cops."
Dad: *stares at son for a while* "Okay, good boy. You want some ice cream?"
Son: "Uh....Sure, but that's not all."
Dad: "Oh my god. What now, son? Hah?"
Son: "In order to lie.... I had to fail the test."
Dude 1: Did you hear about those asians taking a lie detector test?
Dude 2: Yeah, I haven't seen 'em since, do you know where they are?
Dude 1: No...
What the actual fuck are the profile names here? Like you can read a legitimately interesting post and the author's name is poopybutwizzrizz and then read the most obscene and absurd post and have the name be something a little more normal like bicycle\man or some shit like it's kind of messed up tho.
What are the profile names here on Urbandictionary like actually they're sad as fuck tho
ikr it's just sad
Someone who is a lying cock-sucking asshole whos last name just so happens to be Largent. Their name is short for Large Genitals, which is a disgrace in and of its own. Good luck lasting more than -13 years, Large Genitals.
Teacher: Largent?
Largent: Yes?
Teacher: Shut the fuck up, Large Genitals.
Porghub.com is a website where Star Wars fans relieve themselves of stress and, if in the mood, even get kind of excited..... U know what I mean.......
Were you watching Porg?
Yeah, I was on Porghub.com last night. My bed sheets are wet now.
Someone who will shred your sins away, looking extremely sexy for an 13 year old man with a full grown beard and the hole-iness of God himself. Damn, they must be full of holes. My favorite, h ttps://www.youtube.com/shorts/1vgUl9ASXh0
Steezus Christ will shred the shit out of God himself, not just our sins.
We all remember that day when we learned what cancer was, but my parents in particular did excruciatingly well telling me that half of my mom's side of the family had cancer and that they were going to eventually die. In fact, I think she first told us(me and my brother), at the ripe age of 4 and 2, that our grandma had stage 3 breast cancer and was going to die. She didn't even tell us what cancer was, for fuck's sake. And the consequence of that was me going on for another 8 years thinking cancer was instant death and that different parts of your body could get it.... Like, what the fuck? And then turns out my Grandpa had prostate cancer, so that was fun, but not as lethal. Another one of my great-uncles had ball cancer AND lung cancer. I can only pray that I don't share any of their fates, but I think one of the reasons she escaped it was because she went to med school. Definitely not me, so I can only hope.
Mother: Son, your grandma is going to die.
Son, crying: What?! Why??
Mother, in a perfectly calm face like this happens to her all the time: Cancer.
Son, noticing her lack of caring: Fuck you. Goodnight forever.
results of when your parents explain to you what cancer is
1👍 1👎
If America was communist, I do believe that we would be on better terms with Russia, whose allegiance with China we will use to take over the world. Eventually the United States would control the entirety of the Americas, and Russia having total control of Europe and China dominating Asia. All nuclear weapons would be illegal, however, courtesy of the U.S. Then these three countries would have a space race to Mars, and eventually defend ourselves against multiple alien invasions. Each of the species we defeat we learn from and advance our technology, and to the point where we are now able to travel the stars. Sadly, as communism is a form of government frowned upon by many, a resistance is formed that brings communism to its knees, but as a last attempt of justice, the communists nuke the entire planet, destabilizing it enough that Earth actually implodes in a fiery disaster, destroying the entire solar system.
If America was communist.... Oh, imagine!
The fate of our planet is now set... Nothing we can do now can or will change it.