heissucha

Overused start of a phrase. 50% of people that submit entries in UD to be published simply take the first name of their friend,enemy, ex-boyfriend, and tack it onto the end of this phrase.

Hopeful entry into the sacred dictionary: Heissucha Robert.
***sound of mouse clicking on the reject button***

24👍 7👎

gilligan

1)to spend time with beautiful women coming on to you with no possible consequences (it was the sixties), and yet avoid getting laid for seven years. I mean, WTF?

I'm pretty sure Herman Munster or Eddie Haskell wouldn't have pulled a Gilligan if they had their druthers.

88👍 33👎

cat clock

The cat's asshole, because it resembles a watch dial. See Tabby TimexPekinese Rolex

Grandma thought she saw a cat clock. Every time the cat walked through the kitchen, Grandma would point at the asshole and say, "I can see what time it is." It was time for her meds, that's what time it was. Gimme the tin foil hat, Grandma!

61👍 13👎

basketball pussy

Sometimes known as a gunt, but pronounced enough to look like a Wilson attached to a vagina. Does not bounce true from in the paint.

She wasn't pregnant, but the basketball pussy was enough to keep the fellas from asking for a dance.

86👍 19👎

sheissucha

A phrase tacked onto the front of someone's name, be it friend, enemy, ex-girlfriend, girl who rejected you. Handy for the lobotomized.

Overheard, at the busstop;
Madison- "Sheissucha Ashley! Ohh, I hate her."
Kaitlin- "Did you get that from the Urban Dictionary? Cause that is f-in' brilliant! The entry I read said that 'Eva is a creative and sweet person, who I would love to to diddle.'" I crossed referenced diddle, and that means you would like to 'to touch or caress the genitals in some way.' Is that what you meant?
Madison- Oh, I don't know what I want! Why is growing up so angst-ridden? Aargh!
Kaitlin- Damn you Urban Dictionary, for confusing our hormonally supercharged adolescent brains more than ever! Curses to you, UD!
Emily-WTF???

19👍 7👎

mudshot

turgid wet mix of poo that is ejected with a single flexing of the gut. Shrapnel splatter is an acceptable casualty, but the bulk of the pile should be a singular paddy centered directly under anus. Often accompanied by feeling of well being and accomplishment. Underreported as the Eureka moment it is.

He lowered himself and quenched. The mudshot was almost painful, it was so beautiful. He felt himself drawn to a bright light and people who had been long dead surrounded him. It's not your time yet, they told him. There is much wiping to do. When he opened his eyes, he knew what to do. He put in his notice at work and bought a Harley that afternoon.

77👍 16👎

Fellini

Oral sex that leaves the penis permanently bent.

Samantha assured me that she wouldn't use her teeth, but I had a Fellini to show for it.

78👍 13👎