smoke screen

Underpants. Silk filters flatus 80% than cotton, except in the event of broccoli consumption.

Jasmine thought the thong would erase her unsightly panty lines, but she forgot that she also was foregoing the smoke screen her panties afforded her. The tacos she had for lunch produced shrapnel that the thong was unprepared to deal with.

67👍 37👎

taste the rainbow

The act of putting skittles into some unlikely body part for the purposes of feeding another. See pez dispenser, orbit gumming.

Sean: How's it going there, Jess?
Jess: Mmmmpph Mmph!
Sean: Pull your head out for a second. I can't understand a word you're saying.
***Thwwwp***
Jess: I taste it! I taste it! I taste the rainbow! (She looks up at Sean with a speckled smile).
Sean: (Disgusted) Ok, back to work. (Closes his eyas and leans in).

141👍 168👎

marble bag

Speedo bathing suit.

Kevin, at the pool: Hey what's that clacking noise?
Mark, puffing out his chest: That's my marble bag. Check it out.
Kevin, cupping: Not bad, not bad.
Mark, jumping back: Hey! Look, but no touch!
Kevin: I've held better.

183👍 38👎

chesticles

What you get when you dive into icy cold water. The balls snap up through the abdominal cavity and come to rest in the thorax.

The water was so cold, Charlie got chesticles. his Speedo flat as a Ken doll.

223👍 215👎

cotton panel

Apparently something that allows a vagina to breathe.

1)She seemed to be suffocating, but the gathering crowd didn't seem concerned. Her panties were constructed with a cotton panel.
2)When asked if her pussy would like something to eat, she seemed surprised, but the bartender motioned to her cotton panel, and she gave him a Mentos smile and agreed that a cocktail might do the trick.

91👍 15👎

carson

1) Verb meaning to take a golf club and swat at someone's testicles (ala Johnny Carson)
2)The act of holding someone's balls to the forehead in order to concentrate (ala JC's Carnac the magnificent)
3)A means to get a new car advocated by Toyota.

1)I passed out on the floor of my frat house and awoke just before Weber gave me a carson. I fled through the pantry door with my morning wood intact.
2)I wouldn't say I was her fuck buddy per see. Sure, I got off, but I was starting to suspect that she needed to think, and was only waiting till I slept before she carsoned me.
3)That Toyota Prius is looking sweet. What would the total carbon output be if I were to carson my subaru?

285👍 250👎

finless brown

analfish that populates the toilet. eyeless as well. Often known as Finless brown trout.

I feel the need to stock the pond with finless browns

69👍 7👎