shoeman

a) A middle aged male failure who sells women's shoes and supports a family via a minimum wage income.

b) A man who frequently reminisces about his high school rectitude or notoriety.

Al Bundy is a shoeman.

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panis

(noun.)
An unsightly bulge which folds over ones belt and or genitalia. Typically derived from extreme obesity or childbirth.

Kyle was so fat that pretzels and pennies became lodged within the fold of his panis.

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