Youseff

A Youseff is a creepy paedophile egytian, commonly found in the bushes outside your house wearing nothing but a creepy smile that no-one is really all that comfortable with. Youseff's are known to keep Hit Lists of their enemies and will add you to it for even recoiling in horror at his stench. If confronted by a Youseff, run. Fast. As far away as your legs will take you without breaking off. Even then, crawl, till your hands are bloody stumps. If escaped is not possible, a highly recommended defence is to play the song "Walk Like An Egyptian", this will cause a Youseff to fall into a trance like state of walking like an egytian. Use this time to escape. The reward for killing a Youseff is $5.50 or two Asian sex slaves.

"Ah, what the fuck is that....Its hurting my eyes....ah fuck it's a Youseff, shit, where's my Ipod!?!?"

101👍 49👎

The Biggest Loser

An aptly named show that parades around fat people who cry alot. This show, like most reality TV, pre-selects its contestants to be emotionally fragile people who will inspire sympathy in its viewers. Unlike most reality shows, The Biggest Loser awards people for doing things they should have done their whole life. The show offers contestants a chance to get immunity from elemination which almost always invloves having to eat large portions of unhealthy food, thus making the objective of losing weight redundant. Anyone who feels sorry for the contestants should be stabbed in the torso.

Non Fan: I've never seen The Biggest Loser before, is the winner the one who looses the most weight?
Fan: Nah, its the loser who cries and degrades themselves the most.

62👍 60👎