Bryan

He is the most humorous and seductive guy with a 6inch howitzer. Able to penetrate 800mm of composite pussy armour from a range of 10km. (May or may not have single-handedly won the battle at Golan heights.) Bryan is also a staunch defender of his religion and if he so happens to be catholic he may very well go on a fucking crusade to slay the fucking heretics.

Wow i must have been in the 10km radius of Bryan i can already feel the baby kicking in me.
General Bryan has personally slain the ottoman garrison in acre