Random
Source Code
Random
Spending over $100,000 in taxpayer funds to implement a shit collection of shit band-aid solutions on some existing piece of fucking shit.
Gov guy 1: "Man, I can't believe you spent a hundred bucks on that piece of shit car."
Gov guy 2: "Yeah, it's not gonna work. We better invest a few hundred K in improving it."
Gov guy 1: "You know you can get a solid, working car for $10,000, right?"
Gov guy 2: "Yeah, but then I'd have to admit that I threw away that initial hundred bucks, and I'm much too proud. So, you know, I'ma implement The Platinum Solution"
26π 6π
When two people interlock faces such that each of their mouths is close to the other's ear. This is generally the only way to have a conversation in a crowded club or bar.
"I got the digits of this girl that was probably pretty hot. I'm not sure though, I didn't get a good look at her since we had to ear-69 to talk."
11π 3π
The most flaccid statement in all of history. It is scientifically impossible to fit more ridiculous into three fucking words.
"Wait, so if nothing is impossible, is it possible that something IS impossible? Man, what the fuck."
57π 5π
Complete engrossment in one's Blackberry, resulting in voluntary blindness and total ignorance of one's environment.
VJ: Dude why did you plow over that old lady?
Mike: I just had to finish the last line of that email. Total blackberry blindness.
48π 7π
Sex with one or more dead animals that are on fire and the same gender as the initiator.
So the guy just picked up this clearly male squirrel, broke its neck, set it on fire, and started buttfucking it, cuz he's into homopyronecrobeastiality.
79π 18π
Sexual attraction to extraterrestrials.
You think your girlfriend's a freak? Mine's into xenophilia - I have to wear green antennae every time I wanna have sex.
184π 149π
One who goes to great lengths to pay as little as possible for gas.
"I get gas whereever I need to; I'm not gonna bend over backwards to save, like, a dollar, cuz I'm no fuel economist"
19π 4π