spicy apple pie

Improperly called "Angry Balls," this is an exquisite adult beverage that is comprised of Fireball Whiskey and Angry Orchard Hard Cider.

Person 1: Do you want some Angry Balls?
Person 2: Angry Balls? What is that?
Person 1: Fireball Whiskey and Angry Orchard Hard Cider mixed together in deliciousness.
Person 2: That is not called Angry Balls. You are wrong. Don't ever call it Angry Balls again. It is called a Spicy Apple Pie.
Person 1: Oh, ok!
Person 3 (after trying Spicy Apple Pie): Now that's a spicy apple pie!

hand rule

The standard against which optimal breast size is gauged in seeking a suitable mate, etc.

The optimal breast size is equal to the amount that can be fit in one's hand; any less is not enough and any more is excessive, wasteful, and unnecessary.

The curve follows a sharp Gaussian/Cauchy–Lorentz function and distribution.

f (x; 0,1) = 1 / π (1 + π^2)

This is also known as the Breast-Volarity curve.

Person 1: Wow, she has exquisite breasts.

Person 2: Eh, they're too large.

Person 1: Nonsense!

Person 2: Don't forget the Hand Rule.
Person 1: Ahhh, good call.

Breast-Volarity Curve

The standard against which optimal breast size is gauged in seeking a suitable mate, etc.

The optimal breast size is equal to the amount that can be fit in one's hand; any less is not enough and any more is excessive, wasteful, and unnecessary.

The curve follows a sharp Gaussian/Cauchy–Lorentz function and distribution.

f (x; 0,1) = 1 / π (1 + π^2)

This is informally known as "The Hand Rule."

Person 1: Wow, she has exquisite breasts.
Person 2: Eh, they're too large.
Person 1: Nonsense!
Person 2: Where do they fit on the Breast-Volarity Curve?
Person 1: Ahhh, good call.