douchington

Someone who steals all your billions and is generally a douche.

"What's up douchington?"

"No, there's no Douchington here."

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slap the raccoon

Something one does when bored that IS NOT masturbation.

"How would you make a raccoon mad?"

"Slap it."

"Why would you slap the raccoon?"

"Boredom."

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