Sandwich-beard

A rare species of mammal that lives exclusively on community college campuses. It is roughly seven feet tall, with a large hump in its back. This bipedal hominid has long, scraggly facial hair, which usually has bits of sandwich in it (from whence it's common name is derived; its scientific name is Sandwichus beardicus).

Several species of bird nest in its unkempt facial hair, and it cares for this colony tenderly, so that it can feast upon them at a later date. This "farming" method may denote some semblance of intelligence, though its mental capacities are dubious, as the creature seems to have invested over ten thousand dollars of its own money in a bad mermaid movie.

The Sandwich-beard uncurled from the foliage of the community college parking lot, emerging into the sun, and attempting (in vain) to find a mate.

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Custer Fuck

(kə-stɚ fək)

noun

1) A pun combining "Cluster Fuck" with the name of General Custer, the dickbag from Little Big Horn whose decisive defeat in part led to the massacre at Wounded Knee (because Americans are sore losers).

2) To be defeated through treachery (backstabbing, dick movies, breaking of treaties, etc)

3) To be systematically denied basic human dignity

1) Why has no one thought of the pun "custer fuck" before?

2) Man, Wounded Knee was a total custer fuck

3) The Pine Ridge rez got totally custer fucked.

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Skedat

(verb) A shortening of the common phrase "skedattle," it is dual-syllabic word that is more apt to be used in everyday life, due to common slang's fondness of phrases that are less than three syllables. It is commonly used to describe hurridly departing; last-minute recognizing that you have to leave.

HOLY CRAP! Look at the time! I've gotta skedat--sorry!

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groovy waffles

(adjective) A recently (2010) evolved term that is derived from the 1960s-era slang-term "groovy" and the delicious breakfast food "waffles." It is a distant relative of the phrase "cool beans," loosely connected only in that they join together a slang term meaning "good" with a food item.

It has multiple possible uses, though the most common is in the situation that something is both offbeat and awesome, hence deserving an adjective that is equally offbeat and awesome.

Question: Hey did you see that girl dancing around with the flaming hula-hoop?

Response: Yeah, that was totally groovy waffles.

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