Santa

Some fake fat fuck who watches you when you're sleeping and knows if you've been bad or good, he also breaks into your house which is highly illegal, he is also a drug addict. Long story short, SANTA IS NOT REAL KIDS!

P.S: He is a perv

Kid: Daddy, is santa real?

Dad: No, he is fake, don't believe the stuff you see on the internet!

Kid: *Triggered*