Rectal Investigation

Anal body cavity search performed during a traffic stop by police

Pulled over for speeding, Willie soon became the target of a lengthy rectal investigation in the officers futile search for crappy contraband.

Irritable Growl Syndrome

A canine condition that causes your pup to growl at imaginary things, like when you chain them out late at night to go to the bathroom, or when you’re trying to sleep. Also characterized by barking for no apparent reason.

My dog Mutley growled and barked all night about nothing, he must have Irritable Growl Syndrome.