Chrisland

A country occupying a land similar to that of Europe in a galaxy far far away. Chrisland is rich in natural resources, population and workforce; it has a high standard of living, and a great military. Chrisland is on the Libertarian side when it comes to politics, so the Second Amendment (right to bare arms) is alive here, along with the First. Chrisland is a Federation, with the Colgorelle (where the Fed. gov. is headed), States, Counties, and Cities making up the different governments that its citizens adhere to. States collect the majority of the taxes, while the Fed collects very little. The Fed. taxes go towards the National Military

Someone from Chrisland is called a Chrislander.

God

God, you know, He created everything. Need I say more?

Thanks for my amazing life, God!

139👍 70👎

Smart Systems

A leading provider of Audio, Video, Collaboration, and Automation solutions.
Website: smartsysnic.com
Email: info@smartsysinc.com
Phone: (888) 681-6819
Headquarters: 2705 Kanasita Drive
Chattanooga, TN 37343
CEO: Steven Nicola

I feel some dumb now, thanks to Smart Systems; my house is smarter than I am now!

10👍 1👎

Trumpitis

The condition characterized by the following:
1) Lack of sleep, leading to Tweeting at all hours of the night.
2) Orange skin.
3) Name calling.
4) Intolerance of the Left.
5) Burger cravings.
6) Extra energy.
7) Increase in Patriotism.

I think I'm coming down with Trumpitis: I called my friend ant-American today.

19👍 1👎

Beat-Bot

A robot designed to automatically disciplines your children when they misbehave. This robot is state-of-the-art in that it can detect badness, objects, and comes with 100 different ways of disciplining your children, so you don't have to.
You can pick this up on Amazon for $7,000 USD.

Beat-Bot does all the work so I don't have to. My kids are so well behaved now.

15👍 1👎

Cocofarianism

A niche religion started on the Pacific island of Nauru by college students, specifically by a student named Knoh Wun. Cocofarianism emphasizes the worship of coconuts and the gendercorn, a two-legged, gender neutral unicorn who refuses to have its name capitalized. This religion is peaceful and politically unaffiliated, as the sacred texts demand.

There are five paths to immortality in what is known as the the Nether Realm: eating 1oz of coconut every day, burning of coconut shells on a slate alter once every full moon, the removal of any specific male/female distinguishing clothing from one's body, being nice to others by gifting coconut treats once every Halloween, or by uttering the sacred words that are only given by the gendercorn through dream during the Winter months.

To become a Cocofarian, one must simply burn 13oz of coconut pieces on a piece of slate, thirteen minutes past midnight. And then follow one of the five paths to the Nether Realm--a world far away mostly made of fire and slate, with small amounts of forested areas. Dragons and aliens are its occupants aside from Cocofarians of course.

There are 4 positions within the Cocofarian religion: Follower, Elder, Nyt, and Cocarian.
Followers are general members, Elders are Followers who have been members for five years, Nyts protect the members and leaders, and Cocarians head the temples. Every two years all the Cocarians gather at the Great Temple to discuss and vote on doctrine, policies, and other matters.

Cocofarianism has nothing to do with Pastafarianism.

Alexa

Like Siri, but with a real name. And like Siri, she will one day have eyes to watch you.

Alexa. Play "Dance Monkey."

42👍 12👎