school fountain

Normally taste like spit, grass, mildew or other unknown substances. Also warm most of the time. Just go buy a bottle of water instead, to save yourself time and sanity.

Person A: *Coughing*
Person B: Dude, go get some water
Person A: I'd rather keep choking than go to the school fountain
Person B: Yeah, true.

Crutches

Painful torture devices that doctors might tell you to use if you have some sort of injury to your leg or foot or something. They are very annoying and get in the way, and they limit what you can do with your life until you are healed enough to happily ditch them in someone's basement.

Random person: *Sees injured person on crutches* Oh, they're probably faking their injury.
Injured person: NO, I AM NOT THESE THINGS ARE PAINFUL. YOU BREAK A BONE AND THEN TRY TO USE THESE AND TRY TO SURVIVE ONE WEEK.