mosquitos

Bloodsucking insects from hell.

Me: These damned mosquitos are eating me alive! They're like thousands of mini-Draculas!

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December

An excellent time of year where the snow is beautiful, the weather is cold, and the closer you get to the end of the month the more your birthday sucks.

If your birthday is very close to Christmas, it is okay to hate your birthday.

I and four other people in my family have birthdays in December, all around Christmas. I hate my birthday.

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Shower nirvana

A word used to describe the women-take-longer-showers-than-men phenomena. It has never been proved what exactly takes them so long to complete a shower, but one can safely assume that they've discovered the enlightenment described in Buddhist philosophy, i.e. Nirvana.

Person 1: Man, what is taking her so long in the shower?
Person 2: Dude, don't worry about it, she's probably just discovered shower nirvana.