Crawls

A sickness or illness where a person cannot stand or walk to toilet from either vomiting or diarrhea or both. So they must crawl.

I won't make it to work today boss got a bad case of the crawls.

Alec Baldwinned

The act of being stuck in a situation of complete absent minded bad luck , something that could've been ovoided if you would've thought it through .

I told my boss I was totally Alec Baldwinned , when I was not the one who wrecked the company truck .