Ass Twister

In meat man parlance, an Ass Twister is someone who gives the impression of wanting to buy, but in reality has no intention of doing so. Crafty and cunning, these time wasters are a particularly insidious breed of shit breather. Also known as come backs and be backs, the Ass Twister inquires about every item the meat man has to offer, frequently interrupts his presentation with inane questions, wants to run their grimy paws on the merchandise, wants brochures and phone numbers and then refuses to buy because they haven't got two nickels to rub together and they've already blown their allotment of food stamps even though it's only the second day of the month.

Russ: "So, if I make you a deal sweet as pie, can you take these six cases I've got laid out here?"

Shit Breather: "No, but if you come back da fust of da monf, I'll be wif you on dem cases!"

Russ: "You Fucking Ass Twister!"

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Golden Shit Pail

Pseudonym for the restaurant chain The Golden Corral, widely known for it's shit inducing buffet fare.

Every time I eat at the Golden Shit Pail, I'm on the shitter the rest of the night.

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Twat Twaddler

1) Any loud-mouthed liberal female politician.

2) Any loud-mouthed feminist, or their self loathing male counterparts.

3) Any loud-mouthed lesbian.

4) Any loud-mouthed all of the above.

Hillary Clinton is such a stupid fucking twat twaddler.

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fecal parlor

Any chain restaurant whose over-priced fare is not fit for human consumption and the ingestion of it typically results in
projectile vomiting and/or explosive diarrhea.

Buffalo Wings and Rings is a total fecal parlor! The wings I had last were so fucking bad, I had to eat a half a can of cat food afterwards to get the taste outta my mouth. I was up half the night blowing up the shitter.

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Meat Man

A door-to-door salesman, peddling frozen steaks, seafood and chicken, from a dilapidated non-refrigerated freezer in the back of a broken down pick-up truck. The quintessential meat man is quick witted, fast talking and slicker than slippery elm and lanolin. He is revered by shit breathers and considered a GOD in trailer parks, section eight housing complexes and suburban blighted communities throughout the United States.

Shit breather: "Yo, Meat Man! Why am dem T-bones black?
Dey look like dey been de-thawed and shit!'

Russ: "No, no, no. It's... um... Aged Angus! Yeah, that's it!

Aged Kentucky Black Angus!"

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