bestie

A girl’s great friend who is a girl if she wants to be super gay about it and make guys die a little inside

Kate: This is the other Kate I was telling you about. She’s my BESTIE. We go way back we’re BESTIES
Other Kate: Awww thanks BESTIE! It’s true girl you’re my BESTIE. Wait no, actually you’re my BESTIE BESTIE…
Struggling male friend: Yes, yes we’ve established that you’re good friends, probably even best friends. Could you just use the scissors to point to the horny Kates or at least CHOP MY FUCKING EARS OFF before you say it again…

The Birthday Card

One may choose to ‘play the birthday card’ within the 24 hour window known as their ‘birthday’ in order to guilt trip somebody into agreeing to their mediocre plans...

Dana: Dude I’m not just gonna come suck your dick at your dirty ass apartment then drive you 2 hours so you can hang out w/ your parents who you pretty much still live with anyways...
Russ: Gee that’s funny cause according to this calendar it’s MY BIRTHDAY.

Dana: Fuck, you’re playin the birthday card? Aight fair enough gahaaahhaahaha
Russ: Byawwwwww

rusty spoons

The rusty spoons are part of a very famous french Christmas tradition where u leave your spoons out side your house on Christmas Eve then a frog will come and take the spoons and return them on New Year’s Day. Over the years the spoons have gotten rusty so that’s how they got the name of the tradition

“Are you guys leaving your rusty spoons out today”

Obiosly we won’t get new spoons we will use the same every year so they get exstra rusty