balanism

As this is the urban dictionary, I suppose the best definition would be 'sticking something up your arse'! More specifically and for those of a more 'technically minded' nature, it is the use of suppositories or pessaries (hence killing at least one myth, that the 'pessary' is a small bird that lives in New Zealand!..that's a cassowary).

Balanism doesn't usually have anything to do with masturbation or marsupials, contrary to popular misconception.

four wheel skid

Cockney Rhyming slang (Cockney=Amusing London Dialect, for all you thick arse americans...That's LONDON...ENGLAND...understand?). Commonly accepted to mean a person of the jewish faith. Derivation follows from 'four wheel skid' = 'Yid' = Yiddisher' = person of the jewish faith. Also called 'four wheeler'.

Presumably in the modern age it is only a matter of time before they are called 4x4 incidents!

"Did you know that Heimi over there was a four wheel skid?"

"No, I knew he was a tight bastard, but I just thought he came from Bedford"

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QCD

I'm not sure on this one, buy isn't it a shopping channel on that shite satelitte system known as 'SKY' (home to a thousand and one retarded Americanisms that gives everyone a really bad impression of everything American!)

" Hmmm, think I'll buy some nice flame retardant pearl necklaces or something...Should I go to Aberkrombie and Felch to get them?"

"No don't bother moving your fat, lazy, retarded arse just QCD them off of the telly!"

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four by two

Cockney Rhyming slang. A person of the jewish faith. Derivation 'Four by two' = jew.

"I didn't know Moisha was a four by two"

"Yeah, might be a tight bastard, but at least he isn't from Bedford"

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Skammin' it

1. To try to get away with doing very little work, whilst looking very busy.

2. To sit in an office all day doing as little as possible, whilst simultaneously pontificating like Jean Paul Sartre on acid, and attempting to be a pseudo cheese eating surrender monkey.

3. To eat large quantities of fast food, have a fondness for solar powered garden gnomes, be a lardy person and come from Essex. Generally to be a 'grown up Frog chav' of very little taste and a proponderance for Burberry Ties (worn to hold up the trousers!).

" Hey King of Zogs, you going to do anything today?"
"No I'm just Skammin' it, might go down the pub for a beer and a gauloise later, if I can bother my left wing, psuedo intellectual arse to do so. Also one might actually need to persuade a patron to buy me a beer as I'm far to tight to buy one myself!"
"Watch out for the feathered rats, they kill anything that doesn't move!"

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twats

1. Defined as a plural noun for a group of imbeciles, cretins, idiots, fucktards, morons, Bedfordians etc. Any group of people of a generally fuck-witted nature.

2. Pussii (from the plural of pussys, which is a bit of an ugly word)

3. Anyone predisposed in a western, liberal democracy (presuming of course, that the majority is always correct?). To vote for anyone on the basis of anything they are 'informed of' by the media/text message from their mate (a big brother watcher!).

"Look at those bufoniform weirdos, what a bunch of twats"...said by a train passenger when approaching Bedford (England) train station.

got offered a twosome last night by the missus, problem was she invited her mate from Bedford so I had to turn it down due to one half of it being beastiality...Shame would have been a nice "twat fest" otherwise.

"I voted for Tony Blair"!

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dole

English word for tax payers money paid out to (normally) foreign, work shy bastards who come to the UK because they were 'opressed' in their own country. More enlightened individuals understand why the scrounging fucks were 'oppressed'. It's called being a 'drain on society. Sensible countries send these scum to us as we are too 'politically Correct' to shoot the fuckers in the head/ Stop them reproducing.

All arabs that come to the UK are just dole scrounging Bastards

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