master cleanse

A silly diet endorsed by Hollywood celebs and people who don't know any better. The dieter consumes a concoction of lemon juice, maple syrup, and cayenne for x number of days. Not usually recommended by any doctor in his right mind, but if you must, 10 days ought to be the limit.

Beyonce and Robin Quivers have shed pounds this way. Jared Leto also used this diet after he gained weight for a film role.

Symptoms include constant hunger, dizziness, fainting, grumpiness, and atrophied baby muscles. Here is the recipe:

- 2 Tbsp Lemon (approx ½ of a Lemon)
- 2 Tbsp Genuine Organic Maple Syrup (not Maple flavored sugar syrup you'd put on pancakes)
- 1/10 Tsp Cayenne pepper (red pepper)
- Ten oz. glass of hot water (cold can be used if preferred)

Beyonce tried the master cleanse so she could lose weight for Dreamgirls, but the entire time, she wanted some chicken fried steak. After ending said cleanse, she put the weight back on immediately.

Robin Quivers did the master cleanse and went from 218 to 145, but now eats vegan to maintain her weight.

Jared Leto got fat for a role in the film because he is sick of still being known as Jordan Catalano and wanted to be taken seriously. The film bombed. He then embarked on his journey and lost over 60 pounds.

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