Hematogasm

When a man ejaculates blood.

Garrett: Dude, I was checking out that Stormy Daniels flick. Pulled it so hard that blood came out my wiener. Am I gonna die?

Bjork: No. it’s just a hematogasm but you should probably spend less time on the internet.

caffeine refractory

In state in which you are so tired, no amount of caffeine consumption has any effect on you.

Sydney: “Dude, I’m so freaking tired I’ve had like 6 cups of coffee and it’s done absolutely nothing, except I’m all jittery.”

Nick: “You hit that caffeine refractory state. Sucks.”

methaphrenia

Schizophrenia symptoms caused by methamphetamine abuse.

Johnathan: Yo Rusty! You seen Jimmy the Junky Pimp around?!? Need to get my rocks!

Rusty: Na man, he used too much ice. Back in the emergency room with that methaphrenia.

Giving the dog a bath

Putting your balls in a woman's vagina. Just like giving a dog a bath, it just won't stay in there.

Dude. I was to giving the dog a bath but my Jessica wouldn't let me. Now I got cold balls.

Spectrumy

Adj. A term used to describe a person you believe to be somewhere on the pervasive developmental disorder (autism) spectrum but you’re not sure where.

Sydney: “I really don't like that Adam guy.”
Nick: “He's legit autistic. Pretty sure. It's been awhile since I’ve seen him but I'm pretty sure. He’s spectrumy.”

Macaroon

The worst fucking cookie in the entire world.

Nick: “I fucking hate macaroons!”
Sydney: “why?!?”
Nick: ahhhhhhhhh!

8👍 7👎

Feng Shui

Chinese for obsessive compulsive disorder (OCD).

Ed: Dude I see your mom rearranged your living room again.

Zander: Yeah man, her Feng Shui is totally acting up again.

69👍 65👎