black-catting

To always try to trump someone else in a conversation.

An example of black-catting is "I have a black cat."
"Yeah, well my black cat is blacker than yours."

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dockyard spanner

A hammer. Suggests that workers in the dockyard are heavy handed and use brute force and wrong tools to achieve desired outcome, regardless of collateral damage caused.

"Pass me that dockyard spanner, would you, old fruit? I need to jolly well tap this nail in."