The Red Bedding

Wait until your girlfriend/wife is on her period. Set the "The Rains of Castamere" on alarm somewhere in your room, house, etc. At this point, pull all the stops at getting your girlfriend/wife turned on, short of full-insertion (hair-tugging, neck biting, etc.) until a majority of hers, and your clothes, are off. Wait for alarm to go off and you hear the theme of House Lannister playing in the background. Whisper "The Lannisters send their regards," and vigorously stab her with your cock.

Girl 1 - "My husband successfully pulled off 'The Red Bedding' last night, I never saw it coming!"
Girl 2 - "Really? My husband knew about that, like, 13 years ago when we read the book."
Girl 1 - "Fuck off, Susan. No one likes you."