really fucking rubbish

A medical condition, this is where someone is unable to do simple tasks. This is a medical condition however, doctors usually tell sufferers of the disease to put their heads in a bucket of water and breathe in deeply, this always seems to do the trick.

Doctor; What's the matter with you?
Patient; I think I'm really fucking rubbish
Doctor; Oh dear, well take these lead weights and go deep sea diving with five attached to each of your feet.
Patient; Okay, thanks doctor

Jon; What's the matter with Gartside, he can't score
Jack; I think he may be really fucking rubbish, we may have to put him down
Jon; Oh okay then

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