Forrest Gump in a dress

A certain ex-Govorner from Alaska that has a very low IQ.

Allison: "I can't believe Sarah Palin is really the Republican hope for 2012...she is Forrest Gump in a dress!"
Kris: "You betcha!"

13👍 1👎

Foot Farts

When you are wearing flip flops and they make you feet make fart noises.

Allison: Oh my hell! What the fuck did you eat for lunch today?
Kris: No, it's not my ass! My flip flops are giving me foot farts!

17👍 7👎

High calorie pussy

A girl who's pussy seems to have some caloric value because every partner they have puts on weight.

Allison: "Wow! Jennifer has only been with Rebecca for two months and she looks like she's gained 25 lbs!"
Kris: "Yeah, Rebecca seems to have some high calorie pussy"

15👍 3👎

Creaming her clock

To ejaculate in a girl's face.

Allison: "I can't believe JJ's boyfriend email broke up with her!"
Kris: "Yeah that's worse than creaming her clock!"

4👍 3👎

Purse Voyeur

To look in a woman's purse while it's open to see what kind of things she has in there.

Allison: Your sister takes a lot of perscription drugs!
Kris: How do you know that?
Allison: I was being a purse voyeur.

External Hard Drive

Strap-on dildo for lesbians.

Allison: Did you remember to pack the external hard drive?

Kris: Yes, but I forgot the lube.

32👍 6👎