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Taling pills in rapid succession.
Them: How are feeling after the surgery?
Me: I am in SO much pain. I'm taking my percs like jujubees.
Close quarters syndrome is when you develop feelings for a co-worker that you probably would've never liked if you didn't spend so much time with them. Be careful, it's easy to snagged by a narcissist with close quarters syndrome.
I don't know what I ever saw in that guy. He was my manager. It must've been close quarters syndrome.
Twitter Stickers are another name for a bumper stickers. They both convey an opinion in a minimum of words.
Me: Omg - that's hilarious - look at that guy's bumper sticker.
Him: What does it say:
Me: It says, "How am I driving? How does a car really work?. How does a loving God allow such much pain."
Him: Well we certainly knows where he stands. Bumper stickers - the original twitter!
Me. They're twitter stickers
A fly that is an equal opportunity offender in terms of being annoying and/or embarassing during televised appearances is fly-sexual.
Him: Hey, did you see that fly that kept bothering the VP during debates? It was all anybody focused on. It was hilarious!
Me: Did you see that there was also a fly on the Supreme Court nominee during the hearings!
Him: I goes this one is fly-sexual.
A government colonoscopy is when you arrange for the ATF, the IRS, and unemployment to investigate your abusive ex, since you couldn't get him arrested for abuse, hopefully he will be arrested for tax fraud or illegally owning a firearm or abusing unemployment during COVID.
Did you ever get Killian to stop stalking you?
I ordered a government colonoscopy for him. He has bigger problems now.
Bitching into someone's ear when you don't want the group to hear.
"I'm going to take a picture but I have to turn on the flash." Friend whispers bitches only to you -" Flash photography makes me look awful" Me - Please stop the whisper bitching.
Like a gold digger, this person marries for money, but the catch is they have to be old to the point that they only two inches left
Me: Did you see that Amanda from high school married that rich dude with all that money and can only get around in a wheelchair.
Her: I'm thinking that she thinks he has only two inches left.