Garyoke

The act of singing very badly on Karaoke - always in a West or South Yorkshire accent - most often performed by people called Gary from council estates in various parts of Yorkshire.

"Oh dear, there's another Garyoke madman up there, singing 'Alright Now.' "

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Actioned

Absolute bollocks spoken by incompetent managers, particularly those that work in the civil service or call centre environment, who wander round uselessy with bits of paper, bollocking people for no good reason other than they are a Grade A twat.

"Phil, I gave you this case to complete last week. Why has it not been actioned?"

"I've been busy colouring in Shere Khan and Baloo from The Jungle Book."

"Oh..."

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Undispansionable

A private sector term, spoken by a CEO who thinks he is a ruthless over-achiever, when in reality he is a useless wanker.

A true definition of the word undispansionable means a business that can't be bought out/subject to hostile takeover because it is actually perfoming so well that the idea of financial problems/staff cuts/low profit margins are laughable.

"I really want to take over this business but it's doing so well that it is completely undispansionable."