wannabe fuck up

Worse than a fuck up a wannabe fuck up goes out their way to draw attention to the "fact" that their life is sooooo bad. They tell you all their "problems" which are not really that bad and blame any failure or error on their part on their past. They make public displays of sadness or stupidity and want the world to know how "hard" they have it. They actually want to be victims when they are in reality probably not at all. Some film examples of wannabe fuck ups are Demi Moore in St Elmos Fire, Billy Crudup in Inventing the Abbotts and Clea DuVall in The Faculty.

wannabe fuck ups are much worse than fuck ups, they REALLY piss me off!

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Baby weight

The excess weight a women continues to carry after giving birth.

"Rich your mum looks well fat!"

"Yeah its her baby weight"

"She had my kid 2 years ago! Tell that bitch to get down the gym"

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back door boogie

Either -

a) Someone who ditches his mates early on a night is doing a back door boogie

b) A method of sneaking in clubs, thus avoiding paying the extortionate enterance fees, by kicking in the fire door and running straight into the middle of the dance floor so you cannot be spotted by the meathead bouncers.

"Dude i cannot be arsed paying £10 to get in here tonight"

"Fire door round the back, lets do a back door boogie"

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coloured commonwealth cousin

A term used in the UK to signify a black person

"theres John, hes one dull coloured commonwealth cousin"

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banged the spine out her head

To engage in the act of lovemaking in a rather vigious fashion

"Fuck me I'm knackered"
"How come?"
"I absolutely banged the spine out her head last night"
"who?"
"Your mum Dan, duh!"

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Baywatch Fuck

During sex one must act the whole time like they are in an episode of Baywatch. Things to do in order to be effective at this include -

* Running in slow-mo to the bed
* Actually fucking in slow mo
* Stopping midsex for a muscle posedown with a mirror
* Demanding to be refered to as "The Hoff" during sex
* Oiling oneself before and after sex, and if possible during.
* Sticking your dick far up her ass, claiming you are probing for any nuclear devices if she complains.
* Come on her face, say its good sunblock and then highlight the dangers of skin cancer

Had a baywatch fuck last nite, i just wanted to piss your mum off.

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