Slipper

The most powerful weapon in the universe, first weaponized by the Asians before physics was invented. It is capable of both short and long range devastation, and in the old days it could even be finessed through time and space. It also doubles as fashionable footwear and as such, is very easy to deploy quickly if you know what you are doing.

You got a B in math?

yeah, wh-OH GOD PLEASE ANYTHING BUT THE SLIPPER