ship

An appropriate substitute for the swear word shit.
When you say it, just before the "t" comes out, replace it with a "p".

Similar: crap, shoot, dung, dang it, damn it, shit

Guy 1: Holy ship! My pencil fell on the ground again!
Guy 2: Hey, you just swore!
Guy 1: No, I didn't. I said "ship", not shit!
Guy 2: But you just said the s-word!
Guy 1: Ship.

Math

Mental attack to humans.

Guy 1: What's math?
Guy 2: Mental attack to humans.

e

That one letter that can be used basically anywhere when you have no idea what to respond with.

Guy 1: Who shot that bullet?
Guy 2 (shooter): e.