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Thomas

Well... he's fun, but he claims he has a bigger penis than he really does. Thomas is very proud of where he's from, even if it's a garbage city with nothing of note in it. He claims he loves indie music but really only listens to early Ed Sheeran and one Radiohead song (it's Electioneering, by the way, and if anyone doesn't recognise it when it comes on he shames them, despite never having listened to OK Computer which he claims is the best album ever). His sexual conquests are lackluster but he gives it large to anyone who admits that they're struggling to attract the opposite gender. Thomas has no restraint when it comes to girls, and is a terrible wingman. He can't stop showing off whenever even a mildly attractive girl is around, and will never bow out, even to his closest friends. This will probably come in the form of elongated stories of his gap year, which are definitely mostly fabricated. Don't believe him when he tells you he got sent nudes from a tattooed girl and got laid in a hotel lobby. Thomas has an innate talent to say the wrong thing at the worst time. Overall, decent friend, but probably skip this one on a night out. 3 and a dab/5

Daaaamn, I'm tryin'a pull this hottie but Thomas won't leave us be.

by Super Cool Gertrude December 14, 2017

4👍 5👎